For years, Lisa felt guilty correcting her grandkids. Thanks to your support, she is stepping up to be the parent they need.
Lisa’s* grandchildren, Ricky* and Jaime*, experienced trauma even before they were born. Their mother was addicted to drugs. They were abused and neglected as babies. Lisa and her late husband obtained full custody of their grandchildren when Ricky was 2 years old and Jaime was 6 months old.
The trauma Ricky and Jaime experienced at such a young age still affects them to this day. Now teenagers, they are rebellious, confused and have mental health challenges. They struggle with anger and aggression.
Last fall, their defiant behaviors got them into trouble, and put on probation.
“We were a mess before Highfields,” said Lisa. “I was not in control, the kids were. There was no discipline or structure.”
The court recommended Highfields to help Lisa work on her parenting skills and keep her family together. Lisa began working with Highfields’ therapist, Eric Moor, three times a week.
“In a matter of a month, everything changed,” said Lisa. “Eric helped me understand that I was the parent. I realized if I didn’t start to do things differently, they would go out into the world and they wouldn’t make it.”
One of the biggest obstacles Lisa faced was guilt. Before Highfields, Lisa would ground the kids, and then take it back because she felt so bad about what they had been through in their lives. Eric helped her work through those feelings, and showed her that consequences are necessary to help kids learn and grow.
After five months of working with Highfields, Lisa says there are fewer arguments in the house. Ricky and Jaime see a difference in Lisa, and treat her as the parent now. Although they are still healing from trauma, and will continue to do so, having a more peaceful home will help them significantly.
“I know how to effectively handle challenges now,” said Lisa. “I do it exactly how I learned to do it from Highfields, and it’s all working.”
*Names have been changed